This is the start of my journey. Day March 23, 2010. I am sick of living my life alone, I just can't bear the though of feeling like this forever. No, I don't need a girlfriend, I need someone I can trust. Someone that cares and all that crap. Everyday seems like the same old same old and all of that just leads to depression for me. I'm sick of depression, sick of conformity, sick of this uniformed everyday that I live in. I want to spring out, yet I can't. I want to start a journey for my own, but what journey?
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Hope for change
I was just browsing the health section of 4chan's their website. God they have some awesome stuff posted on their website. They had a post showing how some members of 4chan were able to transform their old ugly self image into something better.
I'm still a teenager and I basically want to improve my image better. Why? To get myself ready for the girl I will live my life with. But really, I 'm looking forward to the result of respect. However, I am always trapped with the security of my mom. Minor security is fine but this type of security is a type where it doesn't freakin benefit me, it mainly benefits her instead. Anyways. I'm going to start doing the same thing as these people. I lost a lot of weight ever since track but I gained it all back. Why? Mostly depression and lazyness. But the reason I find to replace the other reasns is that I gained back all my weight because it felt like I didn't deserve it. God I need to get off this slump, yes it feels comfortable, yes it makes me feel dirty, but I guess we need to get out of our comfort zones right? Right now my life seems like a joke to me. I can't wait to get a car, can't wait to be 18, can't wait to leave this small world, can't wait to showing off what I can do, can't wait to show off what I can achieve, can't wait to prosper. All this school work is wearing me down physically and mentally. I hope what I do is a big benefit to me and my future.
Here are some of the pics I saw on 4chan.
The Blog and Megasha
So lately I have been depressed and noticed how much I was sort of messed up mentally and physically. Well I can't say that I'm messed up, but somewhere on the scale of minor to middle. This blog would record my life from here on out so that I can examine and analyze where I am headed in my life. I don't expect people to read this since this is pretty much a record or diary of my life. It will be something that I can use to sort of my thoughts. In the end, this will be used to record my life, while I try to make myself become a better person.
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